This is a continuation from:
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-29-international-crime-research.html
Please refer to: Day 24: International Crime Research – Child Pornography Part 8 for background information, on how and why I will be walking the characters of Criminals/Offenders.
To recap: the following blog is written from the perspective of familiarizing myself one and equal with the mind, character and personality of someone who watches/consumes child pornography. By walking equal to the mind of the user, I am able to draw from it, the contributing factors from the initial thought to the decision that is made to watch child pornography and how the mind is further fueled through backchat and behaviors, until in time, the characteristic is defined and directs the being into action, through an accumulation of memories, thoughts and experiences. What follows is specific self-forgiveness on the characteristics within the write-up.
Pedophile Character: Person who watches child pornography as a substitute for male/female sexual companionship.
“ Growing up I had difficulty around woman, I always found myself from about the age of 11 onwards, to be aware that girls are different to boys and from what I had read and been told by my older brother – apparently girls would one day be a very important part of my life. Becoming a teenager, I brought with me the memory of pictures I had seen in porn magazines and ‘adult education’ books – where a man meets a woman, takes her to dinner and bangs her brains out. According to romantic novels he might later on marry her.”
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the pre-programmed personality design of myself as ‘experiencing a difficult time around the opposite sex’
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing my pre-programmed design to consist of the pre-programmed nature and characters of my parents and their parents, as those characteristics they accepted and allowed within themselves, which did not stand as what is best for all – but instead became “conflicted experiences” within the Psyche of the being, through which the mind created more characters to deal with the conflict, which outflows into global problems as we all fight against our characters by fighting with each other.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to align myself from a young age to the thoughts around ‘other young children of the opposite sex being different, strange or making me feel uncomfortably.’
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as a parent to influence children into believing that the opposite sex has a special value or is somehow to be treated differently at different stages of my age-development, through which I teach children to develop experiences as character responses towards other children, which in essence is not necessary and simply becomes part of the game adults play around sex and sexuality as they fight their own sexual repression, and obsessions and maintain the separation between man and woman which is tied into the value system around having money and safeguarding ones surviving within the institution of family as the passing down of ones genes – which is the survival of ‘my’ characters.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take on the conflict my parents experienced in relation to man/woman, as I copied how they were either uncomfortable around the opposite sex, desired the opposite sex or had some hidden agenda towards the opposite sex as they planned and schemed to lure in a partner who would ensure them a safe comfortable life according to the financial status that would be obtained once the partnership/marriage was designed.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to, through media, allow myself to imprint into my character of ‘young male or young female’ the discrepancies towards being male or female which would result in obsessions, lies, abuse, suppression, and character formations – insisted upon by the individual as we force each other into ‘sex specific roles’ to please the ego and the pocket – as we decide from young which partner we want depending on how wealthy we want to be, how much sex we want to have, the breeding of specific charactered children and so forth. Thus in designing and living separation and judgment towards ‘the other sex’ and how this is lived through how we develop relationship and marriage – we are programming our children from young to become the next generation of abusers as they too will adopt values, copied from the parents based in inequality and self-interest.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing thoughts around the opposite sex and myself in relation to them being more than, less than, special, not special, with or without, hating, loving, needing, rejecting, where in the end I manifest myself as uncomfortable in the presence of the opposite sex, due to my participation in the backchat conversations based on fears and ideas I copied from watching my parents, siblings and the characters in movies.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that the opposite sex is somehow different to me, simply because we have different genitalia, due to how my parents treat each other within inequality and how society treats gender as a platform for the allowance of abuse such as in the case of religion, culture, politics and the family system.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use images found within pornography to create an idea about sex and the opposite sex, as if the images portrayed are real and have an actual practical bearing on sex and how it practically functions within the physical.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as parent to teach my child about sex, through allowing pornography and the media to become the number one education tools from which children learn about sex, obscuring the way in which they learn about the body and sex, until all that remains is the child becoming another abuser of the physical to chase the experience of energy and self-glorification as is promoted through pornography and the media.
I commit myself to show how using pictures as a point of comparison, only leads to a world in which we will never be satisfied with the physical reality, because there is always a better picture in the mind of what or how we could/should be.
I commit myself to show that the education, family and religious institutions of this world only exist to develop characters of fear, self-doubt, self-abuse and dependency/slavery and to design the individual in such a way that we will forever remain addicted to characters to try and alleviate the fear that was inserted into us by these institutions through words, images and the example of physical behaviors.
I commit myself to show that if the education, family and religious institutions were really about what is best for all – then the individual would represent what is best for all and not become dysfunctional organic-character robots, driven by symbols and images used through media by the groups that benefit the most from the individuals remaining trapped and dependent on being characters.
I commit myself to show that what we call beauty, love, acceptance, relationship, accomplishment, intellect – are all just mechanisms used by the characters who control others to make the individual believe we are accomplishing something with our lives – while what we are really doing is becoming the characters addicted to consuming and entertain the systems of the mind.
I commit myself to show that what is considered to be a ‘well adjusted human’ – simply indicates societies acceptance of the human as a character – and that for us to accept a child as fearing or obsessing or desiring while being impulsed through the media to participate in Capitalism due to the hidden symbols and pictures – indicates that we are not fit as parents as all we bring into this world are slaves to each other’s financial, emotional and mental agendas (characters).
Further Reading/Viewing in similar Subject matters:
Pornography
2012 God created Vaginoplasty!
The perfect Vagina
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