Day 190: Family Dynamics - the drama continues! (part 3)

Continuing from:

Day 188: Family Dynamics - the drama continues! (part 1)

Day 189: Family Dynamics - the drama continues! (part 2)

The second move that I watched was very similar - I really got a good dose of American feel good drama. It is called 'The Skeleton Twins (2014)' and focuses around the relationship of a brother and sister, starting with the brother trying to commit suicide over his depression, after which the sister invites him to go stay with her and her partner. From there the story develops around his experiences - but also starts showing that the sisters life is not so perfect because again - here comes in the factor of her having affairs left right and centre and general dissatisfaction with her life, which towards the end of the movie places strain on their sibling-relationship which comes to blows and obviously towards the end in true Hollywood style they 'forgive each other' and all is good again.

Interesting, if these movies were to show 'self forgiveness' and changing Self instead of forgiving 'others' and 'moving on'- then obviously people would be bored out of their skulls and it would not be called 'entertainment' because currently our entertainment as I have indicated shows where we are within our current expression within the mind - because what entertains us shows us about what exist in each one of us. Not a pretty picture.

What stands out a lot about this second move, is how we again simply accept things, don’t question things and take life for granted. How pre-designed rules of conduct pre-determine how each person 'must' live. But what stands out clearly in both movies is that if you simply follow societal acceptable 'norms' - in the end all of these people 'secretly' rebelled against these norms and ended up causing harm to themselves and others, simply because the results of 'following' norms and acceptable behaviour had the result of for example people cheating, lying, stealing. So what came first the chicken or the egg? Meaning what came first the human as irresponsible requiring societal norms and rules, or did we as hand full of people establish rules and norms according to what appeared like normal behaviour and this has simply never been questioned. Which means that all of us are to afraid to question 'norms', are to afraid to simply say 'ok I am not happy within this relationship' or in this job etc - I want to create change for myself...' Instead we end up with things like affairs and depression and suicide - because nobody wants to change?

If we don’t change ourselves as the norms and rules and dishonesty we accept inside of ourselves but keep doing things in secret inside ourselves - then how do we ever expect for things 'out there' to get better? I mean on the surface as this movie again reminded me -we put on our best faces, pretend to be happy in our marriages etc - but behind closed doors there are whole other realities playing out for people. We are to afraid to speak up about what really exist inside of us as our secret desires and wants. Then we really act them out - but pretend we don’t. Society in 'real-time' gets harmed by what we really do to each other and ourselves -and then we claim nobody can be trusted and we continue accepting societal rules and norms! Huh?

Day 69: International Crime Research: Serial Killers, Mass Murderers and Sociopaths Part 6

This blog is a continuation from:

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/day-64-international-crime-research.html#

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/day-65-international-crime-research.html

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/day-66-international-crime-research.html#

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/11/day-67-international-crime-research.html

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/11/day-68-international-crime-research.html

Background info: if ave not been walking the Crimes Journey to Life blogs since the beginning - please read the following blog where I explain the how and why I walk this series as 'Crime's Journey to Life':

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/05/day-8-international-crime-research-bi.html

The Serial Killer Mind:
The Case of Jeffrey Dahmer

My Self-Forgiveness will be based on the main points taken from the following article:

The Case of Jeffrey Dahmer: Sexual Serial Homicide from a Neuropsychiatric Developmental Perspective

Fantasies and Imagination

"The role of sexualized fantasies appears to be important in JD’s development as a serial killer because from an early age he was already internally preoccupied with bodies and body parts and later with their sexual nature, a finding that is consistent with previous investigators who think that pervasive fantasy formation has a decisive role with sexual crimes by both adult and adolescent perpetrators. The advantage of the AD (Asperger’s disorder) paradigm lies in that it provides a better explanation regarding the origin of sexual fantasy as an antecedent in serial killing behavior, namely that intrinsically AD tends to promote isolation, resulting in a relative inability to test fantasy formation against the backdrop of the surrounding social world.This pervasive mental isolation may place some AD adolescents at significant risk for developing idiosyncratic and violent fantasies that, unchecked by external social controls, can lead to homicidal ideas and actions. The violent behaviors and other antisocial activities displayed by children with features of AD appear to be more closely related to their fantasy life than to adverse environmental circumstances.

The identification of AD as a decisive factor in the genesis of sexual serial homicide in the JD case may well represent a psychiatrically, criminologically, and biologically relevant paradigm of substantial heuristic and practical value because it may provide a unifying explanation of sexual serial killing behaviors that integrate neuropsychiatric, behavioral, and developmental levels of organization for at least a subset of sexual serial killers. Arguably, the foremost advantage of the proposed pervasive developmental disorder paradigm for serial sexual killing behavior is that it may provide a central insight into the specific psychological causes for serial killing in association with specific underlying neurobiological events.  

In contrast, most typologies for the causation of serial killing behavior strongly rely on sexual motives as well as a need by the perpetrator to control the victims. Egger addresses this issue when he states, “It may simply be (as the author is beginning to believe) that the serial killer’s search to gain control over his or her own life by violence and sex and to control and dominate others is the central and causal factor in the development of the serial killer”."

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist in a sexual-fantasy world, where what I participate in, with regards to sexual-interactions has nothing to do with reality, but merely exists as moments in time as pictures, programmed into my imagination, for my own personal use.

I commit myself to stop using fantasies, which take me away from my physical body and this physical existence, where 'I' am responsible for myself, as my words and deeds.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use the excuse that 'my imagination is harmless' or 'my imagination exists within me therefore it cannot be wrong' - without ever stopping to consider that all parts of the external world already exists within me as my mind-reality - and this I am able to prove by noting down all thoughts I have had throughout my life and asking others to do the same, therefore

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be 'ok' with the external imagination reality, where we manifest into physical actions that which happens firstly within the mind of each human - where we have until now not realized and considered how the external happens because we as the human make it happen through speaking and acting out what happens firstly - 'in the mind'

Therefore I realize and forgive myself for accepting and allowing a fantasy reality to exist within me, where I get to live out the rapist, the abuser, the harmer, the angry one, the jealous one, the vengeful one etc - but judge others who take these same thoughts we as humanity have all given permission to, and live it into physical action.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist in a world where I judge others who physically act out or speak out their fantasies, where I would rather have such a person cling onto immense self control by being like me - where I contain the fantasies in my mind without acting on it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create this inner demonic reality, where i know that in my thoughts I have told myself and 'spoken to others' about controlling our human urges and not acting on them - whereas I realize that this is deception, because it indicates that we are still the abusers, but do so through imagining the acts, which still allow us to experience the energetic release of 'performing the acts in our mind'

therefore,

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see, realize and understand that whether I am physically acting out the fantasies or whether I am doing it in my mind -it is all about the energy that is generated as the act is fulfilled, where I feel that rush of energy move through my body, leaving me feeling 'satisfied.'

therefore

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deny all this time, that I had been abusing others in my mind and for not even seeing that I was doing this, yet judging all along, those who get the energetic experience from doing it physically.

I commit myself to show how energy is the reason why we act physically and participate in thoughts and deeds - and that the starting point of participating in the internal conversations is and has always been about the experience of energy - therefore

I commit myself to show how the inner working of the mind merely exist as one aspect of this physically manifested reality - and is most certainly not separate from this physical reality - because all abuse that happens externally, in the world happens inside first - as a person first makes a decision before acting - therefore

I commit myself to show how the person who acts out their decisions are no different than the person who role plays the scenario in their mind - to in the end follow the scenario through to conclusion which is the energetic release or experience of the energy.

Therefore I commit myself to show that as a being who exists within a physical body within a mind - we are all, always subject to firstly thinking about what we want to do, which involves various 'dimensions' such as pictures, memories, internal conversations and motivations such as fear - then for those who are confident enough or find themselves 'pushed to the edge' within the mind where they becomes possessed within the energy build up - will find themselves acting on the above mentioned mind-aspects.

Therefore I commit myself to share how each are able to stop the abusive nature that the human has become, by clearing out the mind-clutter as systems of thinking that we have developed that grasp moments and turn them into full on battalions of mental action, where we survive against others and situation within the mind - based always on fears and desires - which is self-interest.

I commit myself, when as as I find myself building this scenario in my mind called thinking or back-chatting - to stop, breathe and realize I am now creating myself into and as an abuser and that the solution is always to look clearly at common sense, practical, self honest solutions to situations - that can be used by all, equally as it serves always what is best for all.

Day 19: International Crime Research – Child Pornography Part 3

This is a continuation from: http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/06/day-18-international-crime-research.html

Research information taken from: http://www.crime-research.org/articles/536/

“In most countries, street children, poor children, juveniles from broken homes, and disabled minors are especially vulnerable to sexual exploitation and to being seduced or coerced into the production of pornographic material. These children, however, are not the only victims. Sex exploiters frequently target neighborhood children or those with whom they have contact through their vocation or avocations. Additionally, pornographic activity is a common part of life for teen prostitutes. Finally, in many countries, including developed nations, child victims may come from homes where their own parents use them to create child pornography or where their parents offer them to others for the same purpose.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exploit any person for my own sexual gratification.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to view disabled people as less than and to secretly despise their appearance and to believe that they are weaker and therefore not worthy of respect and equal treatment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exploit people who come from impoverished lives, whereby I will use them within Capitalism, to do the dirty work that I do not want to do, because I believe that I am better than them because I have money.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a society in which we have become to carried away with out own self interest, that we have never lived and applied ourselves within functional relationships – therefore allowing the existence of broken homes, which results in the future generations manifesting as the rotten adults that we see as the fruits of our past generations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use specific words in an attempt to coerce someone into getting sexually exited, so that they may feel the need to have sex with me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to allow coercion in our society both as a means of manipulating people to do what we want for personal gratification, but also within consumerism – thus turning exploitation into an acceptable means of ‘motivation’ and ‘desired outcome’ within capitalism and within our personal lives – and calling it ‘power of persuasion’ – thus creating a false impression that coercion shows some form of special ability, instead of looking at the core from which it comes which is based in deception.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to force children into prostitution, simply because I have already justified the existence of adult prostitution, because I couldn’t be bothered to develop effective physical relationships based on trust and self-honesty.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to force children into prostitution, due to my permission to the existence of capitalism, and together with my allowance of prostitution – have over the past few generations become apathetic to child pornography – as I watch all value within life be compromised for greed and self-interest.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to teach my children about greed, thus teaching them that to get what they want – they have to make a lot of money – thus teaching the child that life is equated to money and that life itself means living according to the system and its values based on ego, greed, comparison and all that exists in the mind – that today directs the human as our emotions, feelings and ideas we have of who and what we want to be and how we compete with other humans for attention and self value.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to teach children that it is acceptable to value self as an image to be worshiped – thus minimizing life to a picture which always changes according to how the media impulses people to participate in consumerism.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing my child to learn that Life exist according to the standards of who they are through the eyes of the ego – thus teaching them that they have to do what requires to be done to validate their existence in the eyes of others and through societal value systems – which corrupt the human into believing this is what life is about. In this our children learn that to prostitute their bodies is an acceptable value system because it makes a lot of money and gives people pleasure - therefore it is respected within society.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to teach children my sexual values and the values about the human physical body as I have come to accept it – based on abuse of the physical form in the name of sexual gratification – whereby my actions, likes and dislikes are all based on backchat and judgments about the human form, based on secret mind desires. In this we teach the child to judge the physical form as something that is and should be obsessed with sex, not realizing how we are allowing ourselves to abuse the physical form into a piece of flesh that only exist to honor sexual gratification.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to honor sex to such an extent that I will watch as my children now develop all sorts of patterns and behaviors around sex, which I see, realize and understand is not honoring life as the physical – but only honors the mind as secret fantasies. This is why children develop the idea that it is cool and acceptable to become prostitutes and sex workers, as this allows them to see themselves as desirable therefore valuable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be so possessed by the desire for money and to be rich that I will sell my child into sexual slavery.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be so obsessed with having money that I will find it acceptable within my mind, to use my child’s body in pornography – while obviously missing the entire point behind abuse of the child and abuse of Life on this planet – only seeing my ability to be rich as the only valid reason for my actions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to sell my child into sexual slavery, because I exist in a belief that teenagers enjoy sex and are overrun by hormone – therefore using this to my advantage to exploit my children – which becomes my justification for the evil that I allow.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as the viewer of child pornography to use the excuse of ‘but I paid them money for being the actors, therefore they are doing it willingly’ to continue allowing myself to be blind to what I am really doing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as the viewer of child pornography to use the excuse ‘but they look like they are enjoying it’ – not realizing the coercion that is involved and how these children are brainwashed by adults that use the same mentality of me around sexual possession to justify child pornography.

I commit myself to honor life and to present the solutions for the human to develop from the current mind-mess that we are in – into beings that can be trusted with Life.

I commit myself to expose the life that has become human sexuality and to show how all sexual desires currently is driven by secret backchat images, that are specifically used by the media to impulse hidden drives, to bring out the worst of the human, as we accept ourselves merely to be slaves to sexual addiction, while calling it ‘natural’.

Margarat, H. (2004, August 2). Child pornography: an international perspective. Computer Crime Research Center. Retrieved 21 June 2012 from http://www.crime-research.org/articles/536/

Sex workers and Equal Money 

Shocking secrets of Masturbation –Introduction 

What is Sex – Introduction