Day 70: International Crime Research: Serial Killers, Mass Murderers and Sociopaths Part 7

This blog is a continuation from:

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/day-64-international-crime-research.html#
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/day-65-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/day-66-international-crime-research.html#
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/11/day-67-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/11/day-68-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/11/day-69-international-crime-research.html


Background info: if you have not been walking the Crimes Journey to Life blogs since the beginning - please read the following blog where I explain the how and why I walk this series as 'Crime's Journey to Life':

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/05/day-8-international-crime-research-bi.html

The Serial Killer Mind:
The Case of Jeffrey Dahmer

My Self-Forgiveness will be based on the main points taken from the following article:


The Case of Jeffrey Dahmer: Sexual Serial Homicide from a Neuropsychiatric Developmental Perspective
http://library-resources.cqu.edu.au/JFS/PDF/vol_47/iss_6/JFS2002051_476.pdf


In the following Blogs, I walk self-forgiveness on Sex, Porn, Child Pornography and Masturbation.

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/06/day-18-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/06/day-19-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/06/day-20-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/06/day-21-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/06/day-22-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-23-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/this-is-continuation-from.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-25-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-26-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-27-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-28-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-29-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-30-international-crime-research.html#
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-31-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-32-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-33-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-34-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-35-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-36-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/08/day-37-international-crime-research.html
http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/08/day-38-international-crime-research.html

Now more on:

Sexual Serial Killer

"The identification of AD as a decisive factor in the genesis of sexual serial homicide in the JD case may well represent a psychiatrically, criminologically, and biologically relevant paradigm of substantial heuristic and practical value because it may provide a unifying explanation of sexual serial killing behaviors that integrate neuropsychiatric, behavioral, and developmental levels of organization for at least a subset of sexual serial killers. Arguably, the foremost advantage of the proposed pervasive developmental disorder paradigm for serial sexual killing behavior is that it may provide a central insight into the specific psychological causes for serial killing in association with specific underlying neurobiological events.

In contrast, most typologies for the causation of serial killing behavior strongly rely on sexual motives as well as a need by the perpetrator to control the victims. Egger addresses this issue when he states, “It may simply be (as the author is beginning to believe) that the serial killer’s search to gain control over his or her own life by violence and sex and to control and dominate others is the central and causal factor in the development of the serial killer”."


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing sexual motives to exist within me, instead of a physical sexual self expression.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing this motive to exist within me, through which I use the media as pictures, gestures and empty promises, to lure me through my Mind's energy addictions - into actions that are not one and equal to the physical's sexual expression.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the indoctrination of my mind with images of sexual acts, combines with sexual energies triggered through backchats (inner conversations) that were created by me to specifically generate massive amounts of sexual energy - as I see these images, whereby I become possessed by my permission, through my own design.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself when I become aroused through this sexually charged mind system, to blame advertisements, movies, porn stars and the media -whilst still holding onto this system design within me, within the recesses of my secret mind - where I refuse to let go of 'my precious design' while all the time proclaiming to not really be responsible for these desire that I act out, while possessed by and through my own design.

I commit myself to stop the addiction patterns, that form once I attach an energetic value to a word, picture or gestures.

I commit myself to remain stable here as breathing, one and equal to my physical reality, as I see, realize and understand that it is not the physical that is causing me discomfort and pain - as it is my minds relationship to the physical, through which I have imposed a system design which triggers in time with how I programed it to be, while injecting my energy systems onto the physical body.

I commit myself to realize that nothing is gained by forcing this physical body I have to become subject to my mind-relationships, and therefore I commit myself to learn about how my physical body in fact functions within sexual self expression and from there to walk as the physical in realigning myself here as my cells as they interact within oneness and equality to all aspects of the physical.


Demonology Forum Perspective: Sex Addiction

Pornography

Why am I addicted to Sex?

Day 69: International Crime Research: Serial Killers, Mass Murderers and Sociopaths Part 6

This blog is a continuation from:

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/day-64-international-crime-research.html#

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/day-65-international-crime-research.html

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/day-66-international-crime-research.html#

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/11/day-67-international-crime-research.html

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/11/day-68-international-crime-research.html

Background info: if ave not been walking the Crimes Journey to Life blogs since the beginning - please read the following blog where I explain the how and why I walk this series as 'Crime's Journey to Life':

http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/05/day-8-international-crime-research-bi.html

The Serial Killer Mind:
The Case of Jeffrey Dahmer

My Self-Forgiveness will be based on the main points taken from the following article:

The Case of Jeffrey Dahmer: Sexual Serial Homicide from a Neuropsychiatric Developmental Perspective

Fantasies and Imagination

"The role of sexualized fantasies appears to be important in JD’s development as a serial killer because from an early age he was already internally preoccupied with bodies and body parts and later with their sexual nature, a finding that is consistent with previous investigators who think that pervasive fantasy formation has a decisive role with sexual crimes by both adult and adolescent perpetrators. The advantage of the AD (Asperger’s disorder) paradigm lies in that it provides a better explanation regarding the origin of sexual fantasy as an antecedent in serial killing behavior, namely that intrinsically AD tends to promote isolation, resulting in a relative inability to test fantasy formation against the backdrop of the surrounding social world.This pervasive mental isolation may place some AD adolescents at significant risk for developing idiosyncratic and violent fantasies that, unchecked by external social controls, can lead to homicidal ideas and actions. The violent behaviors and other antisocial activities displayed by children with features of AD appear to be more closely related to their fantasy life than to adverse environmental circumstances.

The identification of AD as a decisive factor in the genesis of sexual serial homicide in the JD case may well represent a psychiatrically, criminologically, and biologically relevant paradigm of substantial heuristic and practical value because it may provide a unifying explanation of sexual serial killing behaviors that integrate neuropsychiatric, behavioral, and developmental levels of organization for at least a subset of sexual serial killers. Arguably, the foremost advantage of the proposed pervasive developmental disorder paradigm for serial sexual killing behavior is that it may provide a central insight into the specific psychological causes for serial killing in association with specific underlying neurobiological events.  

In contrast, most typologies for the causation of serial killing behavior strongly rely on sexual motives as well as a need by the perpetrator to control the victims. Egger addresses this issue when he states, “It may simply be (as the author is beginning to believe) that the serial killer’s search to gain control over his or her own life by violence and sex and to control and dominate others is the central and causal factor in the development of the serial killer”."

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist in a sexual-fantasy world, where what I participate in, with regards to sexual-interactions has nothing to do with reality, but merely exists as moments in time as pictures, programmed into my imagination, for my own personal use.

I commit myself to stop using fantasies, which take me away from my physical body and this physical existence, where 'I' am responsible for myself, as my words and deeds.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use the excuse that 'my imagination is harmless' or 'my imagination exists within me therefore it cannot be wrong' - without ever stopping to consider that all parts of the external world already exists within me as my mind-reality - and this I am able to prove by noting down all thoughts I have had throughout my life and asking others to do the same, therefore

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be 'ok' with the external imagination reality, where we manifest into physical actions that which happens firstly within the mind of each human - where we have until now not realized and considered how the external happens because we as the human make it happen through speaking and acting out what happens firstly - 'in the mind'

Therefore I realize and forgive myself for accepting and allowing a fantasy reality to exist within me, where I get to live out the rapist, the abuser, the harmer, the angry one, the jealous one, the vengeful one etc - but judge others who take these same thoughts we as humanity have all given permission to, and live it into physical action.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist in a world where I judge others who physically act out or speak out their fantasies, where I would rather have such a person cling onto immense self control by being like me - where I contain the fantasies in my mind without acting on it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create this inner demonic reality, where i know that in my thoughts I have told myself and 'spoken to others' about controlling our human urges and not acting on them - whereas I realize that this is deception, because it indicates that we are still the abusers, but do so through imagining the acts, which still allow us to experience the energetic release of 'performing the acts in our mind'

therefore,

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see, realize and understand that whether I am physically acting out the fantasies or whether I am doing it in my mind -it is all about the energy that is generated as the act is fulfilled, where I feel that rush of energy move through my body, leaving me feeling 'satisfied.'

therefore

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deny all this time, that I had been abusing others in my mind and for not even seeing that I was doing this, yet judging all along, those who get the energetic experience from doing it physically.

I commit myself to show how energy is the reason why we act physically and participate in thoughts and deeds - and that the starting point of participating in the internal conversations is and has always been about the experience of energy - therefore

I commit myself to show how the inner working of the mind merely exist as one aspect of this physically manifested reality - and is most certainly not separate from this physical reality - because all abuse that happens externally, in the world happens inside first - as a person first makes a decision before acting - therefore

I commit myself to show how the person who acts out their decisions are no different than the person who role plays the scenario in their mind - to in the end follow the scenario through to conclusion which is the energetic release or experience of the energy.

Therefore I commit myself to show that as a being who exists within a physical body within a mind - we are all, always subject to firstly thinking about what we want to do, which involves various 'dimensions' such as pictures, memories, internal conversations and motivations such as fear - then for those who are confident enough or find themselves 'pushed to the edge' within the mind where they becomes possessed within the energy build up - will find themselves acting on the above mentioned mind-aspects.

Therefore I commit myself to share how each are able to stop the abusive nature that the human has become, by clearing out the mind-clutter as systems of thinking that we have developed that grasp moments and turn them into full on battalions of mental action, where we survive against others and situation within the mind - based always on fears and desires - which is self-interest.

I commit myself, when as as I find myself building this scenario in my mind called thinking or back-chatting - to stop, breathe and realize I am now creating myself into and as an abuser and that the solution is always to look clearly at common sense, practical, self honest solutions to situations - that can be used by all, equally as it serves always what is best for all.

Day 64: International Crime Research: Serial Killers, Mass Murderers and Sociopaths Part 1

Definitions:

Serial Killer:

A serial killer is traditionally defined as an individual who has killed three or more people over a period of more than a month, with down time (a "cooling off period") between the murders, and whose motivation for killing is usually based on psychological gratification. Some sources, such as the FBI, disregard the "three or more" criteria, and define the term as "a series of two or more murders, committed as separate events, usually, but not always, by one offender acting alone" or, including the vital characteristics, a minimum of two murders.Often, a sexual element is involved in the killings, but the FBI states that motives for serial murder include "anger, thrill, financial gain, and attention seeking". The murders may have been attempted or completed in a similar fashion and the victims may have had something in common; for example, occupation, race, appearance, sex, or age group.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serial_killer

Mass Murderer

Mass murder (in military contexts, sometimes interchangeable with "mass destruction" or "genocide") is the act of murdering a large number of people (four or more), typically at the same time or over a relatively short period of time.[1] According to the FBI, mass murder is defined as four or more murders occurring during a particular event with no cooling-off period between the murders. A mass murder typically occurs in a single location in which a number of victims are killed by an individual or more.[2] Most acts of mass murder end with the death of the perpetrator(s), whether by direct suicide or being killed by law enforcement.[citation needed]
A mass murder differs from a spree killing in that it may be committed by individuals or organizations alike, whereas a spree killing may only be committed by one or two individuals. Mass murder may also be defined as the intentional and indiscriminate murder of a large number of people by government agents. Examples are the shooting of unarmed protestors, the carpet bombing of cities, the lobbing of grenades into prison cells and the random execution of civilians.Mass murderers are different from spree killers, who kill at two or more locations with almost no time break between murders and are not defined by the number of victims, and serial killers, who may kill large numbers of people over long periods of time. The largest mass killings in history have been attempts to exterminate entire groups or communities of people, often on the basis of ethnicity or religion. Some of these mass murders have been found to be genocides and others to be crimes against humanity, but often such crimes have led to few or no convictions of any type.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass_murder

Sociopath:

Antisocial personality disorder (ASPD) is described by the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, fourth edition (DSM-IV-TR), as an Axis II personality disorder characterized by "...a pervasive pattern of disregard for, and violation of, the rights of others that begins in childhood or early adolescence and continues into adulthood."

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, fourth edition (DSM IV-TR), defines antisocial personality disorder (in Axis II Cluster B) as:

A) There is a pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others occurring since age 15 years, as indicated by three or more of the following:

failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest;
deception, as indicated by repeatedly lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure;
impulsiveness or failure to plan ahead;
irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults;
reckless disregard for safety of self or others;
consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations;
lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another;

B) The individual is at least age 18 years.
C) There is evidence of conduct disorder with onset before age 15 years.
D) The occurrence of antisocial behavior is not exclusively during the course of schizophrenia or a manic episode.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antisocial_personality_disorder


In this Blog Series, I will look at the fine line between Serial Killers, Mass Murderers and Sociopaths as Classified through Psychology and Criminology and the Characteristic of these same 'Labels' which are found within what we call 'Normal Society'. First I will explore the Psychological Dimension of for example the Serial Killer and walk Self Forgiveness on the Mind of a Serial Killer - consisting of their Childhood, Environmental, Behavioral, and Self-Directed Influences. Then I will take a look at what traits or Characteristics of the Serial Killer, Mass Murderer and Sociopath are found within our World Systems such as Society, Capitalism, Consumerism, Human Thought Processes and the 'rights of the Individual' at the expense of Life on this planet. What distinguishing the rest of Society and the way we permit for example Abuse, War, Genocide, Poverty, Exploitation, all in the name 'Individual freedom and the rights of the Consumer' - from Serial Killers, Mass Murderess and Sociopaths? Lets walk the Mind of the Serial Killer and See what unfolds...



The following Research Paper contains an overview of the Psychological studies behind Serial Killers. If you have a moment and would like to read the complete Document:

http://www.google.co.za/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CCEQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fciteseerx.ist.psu.edu%2Fviewdoc%2Fdownload%3Fdoi%3D10.1.1.97.6084%26rep%3Drep1%26type%3Dpdf&ei=MmWKUJyVEqqd0AWRo4H4CQ&usg=AFQjCNEdxKKg_EHlwU6MjnWEylgsuR9ESA&sig2=OPss7dDVp-12FqRACAXbDA&cad=rja

or if you have a Scribd account:

http://www.scribd.com/doc/13073170/Analysis-of-the-Mind-of-Serial-Killers

In my next blog - I will place the major points taken from the research paper, as background information on the influences in the Life of a Serial Killer as well as 'interesting factors' that allow us to start seeing similarities between what we have labeled as Serial Killers, Mass Murderess and Sociopaths and what are considered to be 'normal consequences' of human Behaviours and the outflow/ consequences of existing in and being subject to the current Capitalistic System, which functions according to the principle of the Value your Life has depends on what Money you have. Death, pain and suffering is basically ok if you are doing it in the name of 'Human Prosperity' and the 'drive of Capitalism' or if you do it due to your personal belief systems, religions emotions/feelings or personal 'choices' based on ones individuality and right to 'Life/freedom of expression'.

In the next Blog, I will focus on the lives of specific serial killers, which provide 'examples' of the research findings - after which I will focus my self-forgiveness on the specified research findings and the 'Mind-Construct' (how the Mind-set or Character was Designed/Constructed) of the various Serial Killers. From there I will explore the various Mind Designs of the Human within a world where any and all forms of Abuse/Suffering are currently escalating and the justifications that exist behind why we allow some to follow their experience of happiness, joy, love and satisfaction over the consequences we create for the lives of Billions, each day and why there has never been any solutions and personal change/self-responsibility occurring in the face of these global problems.

Next: CRITICAL ANALYSIS OF RESEARCH RELATED TO THE CRIMINAL MIND OF SERIAL KILLERS

Day 28: International Crime Research – Child Pornography Part 12

The Secret Mind of the Pedophile continued:

This is a continuation from: http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-27-international-crime-research.html 

In Day 26: Part 10, Self-Forgiveness was applied on the existence and allowance of the Secret Mind. Now I will apply Self-Forgiveness on the Thoughts, pictures and Memories existent within the secret and conscious mind – of this particular pedophile character (taken from Day 26 – Child pornography Part 10)

“I identified within myself – that a part of me was seeing the child’s body symbolically – as if seeing the shape of their bodies and the innocence they represented, triggered an interest within me, which was channeled by me into sexual pleasure.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to associate the picture of a child with innocence and youth.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to access the memory of myself as a child being happy, carefree and innocent – from which I connect these reactions I experience in response to the activation of the memory – to connect to how I experience myself now – whereby I look for ways in my mind to reconnect to happier times in my life to experience myself differently now.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define happiness as moments of free will in which one gets to do what you want, when you want – just like I remember myself being as a child.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect joyfulness to the image of a child – in which I sit sometimes and allow thoughts to surface from my childhood when I still experienced joy – whereby I pull myself into the dimension of that memory and its experiences as for a moment I allow myself to ‘zone out’ of this reality into the mind reality of my memory – and allow myself to ‘feel joy’.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to access all sorts of memories from my childhood in which I imprinted in those memories all the feelings and emotions and behaviors – for me to access ‘later’ in my life.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to daydream, in which I allow myself to go to ‘better times’ whereby I attempt to avoid my current life situation and experience of myself



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use memories to shift myself out of one character or dimension into another dimension, so that I do not have to take self responsibility for the fact that I am generating experiences for myself in my reality which do not serve me and are not what is best for all.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use childhood memories as a safety net, into which I fall almost like a cloud of haziness where I will change myself into a softer gentler person seeking pleasure from innocence and from joyful beings around me.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use dark, depressive memories from my childhood to invoke fear – through which I often will access these memories as a feedback loop back into my mind where I will generate energy of ‘the negative kind’ – after which I will cringe at my own depressive mood I have accessed – after which I will access habits and patterns which allow me to feel better.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as pedophile to use pleasant memories around my childhood as a reference point from which I touch myself and experience the joy of orgasm linked to the memories of my childhood – which in fact exists as me participating in the molestation of children – whereby I am not seeing that the reason behind my actions and decisions are systematic programmed moments I allow now due to the value I have given memories.



If the memory connections are based in Fear-based childhood moments:



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to draw upon my childhood disappointments and fears in which I polarize myself into pain and fear after which I will seek pleasure and joy through various methods which hold the key to entertainment such as ‘risk factors’ and ‘being in control of society’ – such as in the case of the backchat of the pedophile who will draw upon risk and fear and cycle it back into reward – and the reward system being activated through sex and masturbation as the value we as society as the human have placed upon the power and exaltation felt during orgasm.



I commit myself to live here in every moment as if time stands still and I experience every moment afresh – thus not accepting and allowing myself to draw upon memories –which is how we draw upon the value systems given to moments linked into the secret mind of the character reality of self – which functions according to energy and becoming more powerful as the Mind for the being to overcome others and the environment within which one exists.



I commit myself to show how memories are in fact not ‘special’ and that memories are the foundation from which all abuse to life happens – because memories contain all previous moments as imprinted information, which together creates a dimension – where one accesses the ‘information’ and responds to ones present moment as a duplicate of the past moments. Therefore Abuse if only possible if we want something to be more like something else because we cannot Live unconditionally here In the physical according to self honesty and common sense practical living –and have come to use memories to define who we have to be in every moment based on survival of the fittest.



And due to the fact that we have already created so much abuse in the world, we now grow up learning to fear others and to fear the world, without any practical solutions on how to stop the inner battles through which we repeat the abuse, due to the fear of being abused.



Therefore I commit myself to show – how it is possible for all to stop living in Fear, by establishing and showing that there are ways to let go of the design of the human as a survivor – and to show that it is possible for us all to live together equally in harmony with the physical – as the living manifestation of what is best for all. To do this though we have to change what and who we have become as the layers of information we have manifested ourselves as, as our DNA and living selves – and to then clear out the world systems that supported survival of the fittest – to give to each an opportunity to live and breathe without it being about fear and gain and risk.



Artwork by: Andrew Gable

http://www.facebook.com/andrewgableartist

Day 27: International Crime Research – Child Pornography Part 11

The Secret Mind of the Pedophile - continued: 

This is a continuation from: http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-26-international-crime-research.html


In Day 26: Part 10, I walked Self-Forgiveness for the existence and allowance of the Secret Mind. Now I will apply Self-Forgiveness on the Thoughts, Pictures and Memories existent within the Secret and Conscious Mind – of this particular pedophile character (taken from Day 26 – Child pornography Part 10)

“It was a sudden interest in the images that developed due to a response from my body, which was then fueled by my mind through justifications as to why these images are enticing.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to see an image of a naked or abused child and to connect to that a physical sensation of pleasure.



I commit myself to stop connecting relationship lines between moments and myself to use later on as characters.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use the damaged files of my secret mind where I have stored images and ideas linked to sexual gratification – to now in this moment experience sexual pleasure towards a child while looking at a the images through my secret mind which connects the image to the experience of wickedness, evil, control, purity, pleasure, to overwhelm, to need, to abuse, to inflict, to destroy, innocence lost, punishment, childlike, condemned, obscurity, manipulation, blame, etc.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself once I reacted sexually to the image of a child for the first or second time – due to how my secret mind connected gratification to the act of intimacy or harm to a child – to then become addicted to the energy and release of energy – whereby I then created the character of justification – as the voice that would come up inside – as that part of me that could manipulate me through specific words – to keep doing what I was doing – and that what I was doing were ‘my private moments’ – thus infusing into me my conscious participation as the weakness I had become as I decided to harm life – all for the experience of energy as addiction and the false sense of self-empowerment.

I commit myself to show how all symbolic experiences – which are all experiences we ‘give’ value to, which in essence separate us from the physical in self expression – is merely the mind as it programs the being into future reactions based on past memories that were given specific values – usually from within the secret mind where we store the information we experienced conflict towards from childhood as we saw, realized and understood that most of what we were taught was based in deception – as our parents lied about why and how we do things – because they were busy playing out specific characters that were trying to survive. Due to the fact that we as children were not trying to survive and were more ‘physical’ meaning here, breathing, expressing – and our ‘doing’ was not veiled in surviving – we could see, realize and understand with more clarity when our parents taught us their values, beliefs and ideas. Therefore I commit myself to not allow myself to teach a child any bulshit about why we exist, where we come from and who we are – and to stick to the basic common sense of that which we are here as a physical being on this physical planet – equally born to all other life – so that the only character the child becomes is that which is best for all.

“From there I experienced a combination of initial mistrust towards my own experience, but this did not last long as the energy of shame and guilt towards my own sexual reaction, turned to a new thought which surfaced where I simply knew that I liked it.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use fear and morality, as a basis from which I turn whatever image I see into something that triggers reactions in me, which allows me to access my secret mind where I stored ideas of shame and guilt which we as children are taught by our parents and teachers as they stand as the examples of charging the mind by charging the positive polarities of good and negative polarities of bad – through the system of punishment and reward.



I commit myself to share how the education system teaches a child how to create patterns based on good/bad, right/wrong – where the patterns are fueled through polarities until the child designs themselves into a system – which cannot function unless it is being stimulated through fear, manipulation, pictures, words, hope, survival, etc – where eventually we do not live here in common sense as what is best for all – but instead live as character systems – that all have a trigger point, memories for information and a desired outcome depending on what was taught to the child the outcome should be. Most humans believe that they are following the outcome of comfort, achievement, intellect, family, acceptance, love, enlightenment, safety, god etc – but the outcome is actually dictated and designed by those who impulse human beings – which is greed, desire, comparison, ego, self interest, separation, conflict, fear, suppression, obsession, consumerism, etc – all characteristic of the perfect systems that wake up in the mornings – go participate in the money system and come home to the family where you design, create and educate the next generation of systems to serve as slaves to the world system – while all the while entertaining oneself in what we believe is individuality and human rights/freedom – but are all actions that further keep us trapped in the mind - which keeps us as unstable characters that are dependent on the world systems for our survival – where we will participate in the world systems and consumerism – as we attempt to alleviate our characters as we strive for resolution of that which we have really become.

“Somewhere from within me, from within my mind I became more and more comfortable with seeing images of naked children, having thoughts about their flesh which I would normally have about woman and then empowering my mind through further thoughts which made me feel alive with energy, as I was pulled between morality and sexual pleasure.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not take self-responsibility for how I allowed myself to compound my thoughts – not realizing that I was in fact building and designing my physical response as my living self from the thoughts I participated in – as eventually my thoughts became me as the living flesh -as I gave in and followed my thoughts into action.



I commit myself to see, realize and understand the relationship between what we input into the mind and who we eventually become. I commit myself to show how the mind is not ‘something out there, harmless and ethereal’ where thoughts happen to us and at the same time have no bearing on our reality –– instead to show that all actions can be shown to follow a line of information from creation point to action.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define sex as a feeling in the body that happens in reaction to images of naked people.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe and to fuel my belief through how I have participated in sex, that sex is best experienced when a person finds ways to stimulate oneself and to become horny and then to chase a picture presentation of whatever will give one an orgasm.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to observe pornography and how this depicts sexual aggression and disrespect of the human form for profit – and from this to establish my starting point equal and one – in that woman (or men) are there to be fucked and that sex is so important that I must have it and if I don’t get it – that I will charge my mind through memories until I find material on the internet to masturbate to – not realizing that I created this character of masturbator myself, through participating in creating and fueling the value system around sex as it exists in this world currently – instead of taking self responsibility for myself within what I create in this world – of which one point is to realize that to abuse in the name of sexual gratification is not ok by me unless it is really ok by me – which again shows the character that I really exist as – as the real ‘Me’.

Day 20: International Crime Research – Child Pornography Part 4

This is a continuation from:  http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/06/day-19-international-crime-research.html


Research taken from: http://www.crime-research.org/articles/536/


USES OF CHILD PORNOGRAPHY

“Experts cite several reasons why individuals collect child pornography. U.S. Senate Report, supra note 7, at 10-12.
1. Arousal and gratification: Individuals use pornography to stimulate their sexual drive and to aid in sexual stimulation. Some may only fantasize and others may use it as a prelude to actual sexual activity with minors.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use images of people, things or animals to stimulate myself sexually


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use images of people, things or animals to stimulate myself sexually, without realizing and understanding that in doing so I am creating an energetic entity within myself with which I have to keep participating to experience sexual gratification, instead of establishing effective sexual relationships with myself or a partner, which is established in self trust, intimacy and mutual respect for the expression of oneself in the physical.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to disregard the physical body, it expression and the abuse that occurs in the world to each other and the innocence of children, we if secretly believe we can participate with these energetic entities created within the mind, which knows no limit as we have proven within how the human abuses life to entertain the mind.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to continue justifying why I get to participating in the generation of pictures within my mind until I am addicted to masturbating to these energies that overwhelm me, while refusing to see, realize and understand that the same energies that flow through, up and within me as the energies I claim to be addicted to and have no control over and must masturbate to – or else it will drive me to distraction and the inability to function property, are the energies existent within each and every other human who watched child pornography, rape pornography, bestiality and other forms of sex abuse – that I claim to separate myself from and judge the other for.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not consider for a moment the responsibility we all have as equals within this mess we have created, to go and explore how the mind really functions, to develop an effective self-honest understanding that the world is not facing the extent of sexual abuse, simply because satan is making people do it – but instead it is each one of us as the human participating together within what we accept and allow within ourselves – that contribute to the permission that is given equally to the world as it is.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to make such statements as ‘child pornography must stop’ while refusing to see, realize and understand that I too have a responsibility then to look at my own secret mind behaviors and to clean myself equal and one to the child abuser, until NO-ONE abuses the physical to entertain the mind as energy.


I commit myself to stand as the physical support of myself, within sexuality, to no longer accept and allow myself to follow energy as addiction, but instead to establish effective touch and intimacy within myself towards myself and/or a partner – to no longer accept and allow judgments and fears to separate me from participating with the Physical Body.

“2. Validation and justification of pedophile behaviour: The paedophile uses pornography to convince him/her self that their behaviour or obsession is not abnormal, but is shared by thousand of other sensitive, intelligent and caring people.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to consider my behavior within my addiction to pictures and to energy as normal, because all humans function the same way within sexuality, due to no human being self honesty about how the mind functions within the physical and how thus far that has always been the directive principle within sex, with no regard for how we abuse in the name of these beliefs.


I forgive myself as humanity for grouping together within the lie that has become sexual expression, and together to justify each other’s addictions and misuse of the physical for the purpose of individual sexual gratification.


I commit myself to learn how to work with the physical body, as this is the key to effective self-responsible sex, which will stop sexual abuse, because by indication – effective self-honest self-expression, free from addictions – is how we stop all physical abuse.

Day 19: International Crime Research – Child Pornography Part 3

This is a continuation from: http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/06/day-18-international-crime-research.html

Research information taken from: http://www.crime-research.org/articles/536/

“In most countries, street children, poor children, juveniles from broken homes, and disabled minors are especially vulnerable to sexual exploitation and to being seduced or coerced into the production of pornographic material. These children, however, are not the only victims. Sex exploiters frequently target neighborhood children or those with whom they have contact through their vocation or avocations. Additionally, pornographic activity is a common part of life for teen prostitutes. Finally, in many countries, including developed nations, child victims may come from homes where their own parents use them to create child pornography or where their parents offer them to others for the same purpose.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exploit any person for my own sexual gratification.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to view disabled people as less than and to secretly despise their appearance and to believe that they are weaker and therefore not worthy of respect and equal treatment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exploit people who come from impoverished lives, whereby I will use them within Capitalism, to do the dirty work that I do not want to do, because I believe that I am better than them because I have money.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a society in which we have become to carried away with out own self interest, that we have never lived and applied ourselves within functional relationships – therefore allowing the existence of broken homes, which results in the future generations manifesting as the rotten adults that we see as the fruits of our past generations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use specific words in an attempt to coerce someone into getting sexually exited, so that they may feel the need to have sex with me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to allow coercion in our society both as a means of manipulating people to do what we want for personal gratification, but also within consumerism – thus turning exploitation into an acceptable means of ‘motivation’ and ‘desired outcome’ within capitalism and within our personal lives – and calling it ‘power of persuasion’ – thus creating a false impression that coercion shows some form of special ability, instead of looking at the core from which it comes which is based in deception.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to force children into prostitution, simply because I have already justified the existence of adult prostitution, because I couldn’t be bothered to develop effective physical relationships based on trust and self-honesty.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to force children into prostitution, due to my permission to the existence of capitalism, and together with my allowance of prostitution – have over the past few generations become apathetic to child pornography – as I watch all value within life be compromised for greed and self-interest.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to teach my children about greed, thus teaching them that to get what they want – they have to make a lot of money – thus teaching the child that life is equated to money and that life itself means living according to the system and its values based on ego, greed, comparison and all that exists in the mind – that today directs the human as our emotions, feelings and ideas we have of who and what we want to be and how we compete with other humans for attention and self value.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to teach children that it is acceptable to value self as an image to be worshiped – thus minimizing life to a picture which always changes according to how the media impulses people to participate in consumerism.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing my child to learn that Life exist according to the standards of who they are through the eyes of the ego – thus teaching them that they have to do what requires to be done to validate their existence in the eyes of others and through societal value systems – which corrupt the human into believing this is what life is about. In this our children learn that to prostitute their bodies is an acceptable value system because it makes a lot of money and gives people pleasure - therefore it is respected within society.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to teach children my sexual values and the values about the human physical body as I have come to accept it – based on abuse of the physical form in the name of sexual gratification – whereby my actions, likes and dislikes are all based on backchat and judgments about the human form, based on secret mind desires. In this we teach the child to judge the physical form as something that is and should be obsessed with sex, not realizing how we are allowing ourselves to abuse the physical form into a piece of flesh that only exist to honor sexual gratification.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to honor sex to such an extent that I will watch as my children now develop all sorts of patterns and behaviors around sex, which I see, realize and understand is not honoring life as the physical – but only honors the mind as secret fantasies. This is why children develop the idea that it is cool and acceptable to become prostitutes and sex workers, as this allows them to see themselves as desirable therefore valuable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be so possessed by the desire for money and to be rich that I will sell my child into sexual slavery.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be so obsessed with having money that I will find it acceptable within my mind, to use my child’s body in pornography – while obviously missing the entire point behind abuse of the child and abuse of Life on this planet – only seeing my ability to be rich as the only valid reason for my actions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to sell my child into sexual slavery, because I exist in a belief that teenagers enjoy sex and are overrun by hormone – therefore using this to my advantage to exploit my children – which becomes my justification for the evil that I allow.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as the viewer of child pornography to use the excuse of ‘but I paid them money for being the actors, therefore they are doing it willingly’ to continue allowing myself to be blind to what I am really doing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as the viewer of child pornography to use the excuse ‘but they look like they are enjoying it’ – not realizing the coercion that is involved and how these children are brainwashed by adults that use the same mentality of me around sexual possession to justify child pornography.

I commit myself to honor life and to present the solutions for the human to develop from the current mind-mess that we are in – into beings that can be trusted with Life.

I commit myself to expose the life that has become human sexuality and to show how all sexual desires currently is driven by secret backchat images, that are specifically used by the media to impulse hidden drives, to bring out the worst of the human, as we accept ourselves merely to be slaves to sexual addiction, while calling it ‘natural’.

Margarat, H. (2004, August 2). Child pornography: an international perspective. Computer Crime Research Center. Retrieved 21 June 2012 from http://www.crime-research.org/articles/536/

Sex workers and Equal Money 

Shocking secrets of Masturbation –Introduction 

What is Sex – Introduction 

Day 18: International Crime Research – Child Pornography Part 2

This is a continuation from: http://crimesjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/06/day-17-international-crime-research.html

Research information taken from: http://www.crime-research.org/articles/536/

II. SCOPE OF THE PROBLEM

Child pornography is an international phenomenon. Most of the data that exists regarding the extent and nature of the problem has focussed on North America and Northern Europe--regions which have played a key role in the production, distribution and consumption of child pornography. "The U.S. market for child pornography is widely thought to be the most lucrative in the world." Child Pornography and Paedophilia: Report Made by the Permanent Subcommittee on Investigations, U.S. Senate, 99th Cong. 2d Sess. 34 (1986) [hereinafter U.S. Senate Report]. In developing countries, the reality of child pornography is dwarfed by the magnitude of other problems such as poverty, infant mortality, illiteracy, hunger, and disease and often there is little reliable data on the subject. Nonetheless, the pornographic exploitation of minors is a phenomenon that exists throughout the world.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to continue to support Capitalism, even though there is sufficient evidence that Capitalism functions on and profits directly from Abuse that exists in this world, and that most forms of Abuse would be eradicated or prevented if we remove the necessity for people to survive in the money system, and if we remove the principle of greed and profit.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing countries to be separated according to ‘developed’ and ‘developing’ which is a breeding ground for abuse within capitalism, as we separate countries according to these standards, where the developing countries battle for access to basic requirements.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing this division to exist based on profit and greed of the rich whereby we deliberately play games with lives, by holding onto this lie that countries have to develop and earn the right to have access to more resources, instead of realizing that firstly we live and are given life equally – therefore the real evil is to hold countries prisoner according to the standards of ‘development’ within Capitalism.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abuse people based on this principle within Capitalism of Developing – in which I will standby and justify why people do not have access to food, water, shelter, medical supplies, education – simply to advance the rich countries and thus to advance myself within my economic class bracket.

1. Identifying the Victims

Girls and boys of all ages, including infants, are used to produce pornography around the world. Estimates of the number of children worldwide involved in child pornography range from thousands to hundreds of thousands. As to the gender of the victims, Federal Bureau of Investigation ("FBI") personnel estimate that over 50% of all child pornography seized in the United States depicts boys rather than girls. Canadian Customs puts that figure at 75% for Canada. The data regarding childhood sexual abuse in most countries, including the U.S. and Canada, does not reflect the same predominance of boy victims. Virtually all studies have predominance of boy victims. Virtually all studies have found higher sexual abuse rates for girls. Ann Wolbert Burgess &Christine A. Grant, Children Traumatised in Sex Rings, 4 (1988). In contrast, in Japan, it is female minors that are predominantly exploited in pornographic material.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place value on the image of woman or men as having certain sexual response points within me, based on the value I attached to ‘bodies’ from what I was taught since childhood and through media and pornography.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become so obsessed by the female or male form and the sexual erotic value that has been attached to the forms, that I have compounded desire to such an extent within my mind, that I now find rationalizations within my mind as to what stimulates me, even if it means finding the body of a child or animal attractive.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see, realize and understand that within sexuality, the importance has been placed on the absolute sexual gratification, which we compound and intensify through fantasies and desires. Therefore I realize that within the mind, as I compound and intensify my sexual fantasies and obsession, I am in fact designing an entity within me as I insist on fueling sexual fantasies based on pictures. Therefore I realize that the mind of the pedophile exists as the compounding of sexual fantasies based on pictures and desires, and that my mind as it exist within sexual possession as the entity I have manifested through my accepted and allowed participation in backchat and giving value to pictures – is no different that the fantasies justified within the mind of the pedophile as he/she justifies how they participate in secret fantasies to achieve the ultimate sexual experience.

Therefore - I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to justify the compounding of sexual energy within my mind until it possesses me within the physical, while not realizing that the mere fact that I admit to having uncontrollable sexual urges that overflow in me while watching porn and masturbating to pictures depicting the most vile sexual energizing pictures –indicates to me that my possession within and as sex energy is no different that that of any other sexual abuser.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that if I continue to place value within shapes, forms and pictures as what is currently done to sexuality and the female or male form – then I am equally responsible for creating a mind reality with regards to sex and sexuality – which then becomes the basis from which all humans justify their mind and how and why they are allowed to abuse the physical within their fantasies and within the physical action of doing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to condone sexual abuse that I find gratifying within my fantasies while judging the person who watched child porn, not realizing that the dimensions within which the mind gradually designs these obsession works exactly the same for all humans – and that for us to stop the sickness which has become sex as it is designed within and for the human mind – we all have to take self responsibility for our thoughts and the value system we give to sex and the male/female form – within our mind – to purify sexuality so that it becomes a physical expression point.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire a specific male form with which to have sex, and in this judgment through which I misalign myself as the mind from the actuality of the physical form – I am within myself giving permission to the abuse that exists due to judgments of form which fuels desires to the extent of fantasies based on the secret mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be directed through and as the secret mind – where I hold onto all sorts of disturbing images of rape, young flesh, innocent children, animals, objects, gang rape, violation, bestiality, submission, force, power, desire – where I allow myself to masturbate to secret mind images, while judging others who do the same.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place such a value on male/female form through participating in and justifying the existence of models, beauty, youth, fashion, etc – not realizing that I am directly participating in the design of sexual abuse through that - which I support within myself – be it openly or in secret.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that to hide my sexual desires is exactly the same as living them, because by participating in the desires within my mind through the generating of energy which leads to the release as good feelings, or orgasm, has the same result in our reality – where people are now allowing themselves to no longer suppress the desires, but to live them out. Therefore I realize that the key to stopping sexual abuse such as child pornography, starts with me clearing out the clutter within my mind, whereby I use self honesty firstly to reveal to myself what it is that I am really busy doing within my mind to get that energy fix or orgasm. Then I apply self forgiveness to stop this masked energy pattern I call ‘my secret fantasies’ and no longer accept and allow this abuse of the physical form within myself, as I at the same time no longer accept and allow child pornography to be an acceptable form of income as part of the capitalistic system.

I commit myself to stop the fantasies and obsessions within my mind, as I realize the consequence it has within this world as hidden fantasies do not remain hidden, but by the nature of the mind as backchat eventually directs people one and equal into action – as we have come to believe that the mind is real.

I commit myself to develop practical physical touch and communication and mutual appreciation between myself and another, where no fantasies direct who and what I am, but instead sexual expression exists as me expressing my physical form free from judgment, in effective self movement – without abusing another for my enjoyment.

Margarat, H. (2004, August 2). Child pornography: an international perspective. Computer Crime Research Center. Retrieved 21 June 2012 from http://www.crime-research.org/articles/536/

Day 5: South African Crime Research - Radical changes made to rape laws

The University of South Africa’s Criminology and Security Sciences Study guide (2012) – refers to a new legislation that will change how rape cases are prosecuted in South Africa. Through changes to the rape laws, the following factors will help prevent secondary victimization within rape cases:

1.       The rape victim’s sexual history may no longer be taken into account, which will prevent the victim from being seen in a prejudiced light.

2.       The fact that the victim had a promiscuous sexual history does not mean that the perpetrator is entitles to rape her.

3.       An apparent lack of physical injury may no longer be used as an excuse for the offender or as a sign that the victim was not in fact injured (not fighting might have saved her life). 

4.       The fact that there was a relationship between the rapist and the victim does not excuse the rape or imply that she consented to the act.

5.       The bill also counteracts duplication and delays, since victims will not have to repeat their testimony (secondary victimization).

6.       The bill seeks to expediate the finalization of serious criminal cases, especially those of a violent nature, to punish the perpetrator of serious offenses appropriately and to prevent the secondary victimization of complainants.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing rape to exist in this world.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing rape to exist in this world due to the value that has been given to sex and pictures.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give value to sex and masturbation to such an extent that I will sometimes be overwhelmed by the energy until it directs me into action, just like the energy of a rapist that is moved and possessed by energy.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the justification of ‘but sex and masturbation is nothing like raping someone’ to exist within my mind, through which I will secretly continue fantasizing over pictures and other beings, hoping to have sexual relations with them and with the people in porn movies until the entity I create possesses me and directs me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the existence of porn movies, due to my inability to effectively express myself here in my physical body with another physical body, without requiring stimulus and the hidden meanings within my secret mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to turn sex into something disgusting based on dominance and the energy of fear, repulsion, erotica, arousal, through which I have tacitly agreed to the existence of the energy of the rapist within my mind and within society.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear sexually as the expression of myself, to such an extent that I have to turn sex into a perversion, through which I have agreed to all the countless forms of sexual abuse that is happening in the world.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the idea that if a woman was dressed provocatively, she deserved to be raped.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing any pictures and ideas in my mind linked to rape, which causes and has caused me to get sexually aroused.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wait for governments to ‘do something about rape’ instead of me taking direct self-responsibility for rape in this world as parts of it exists within me as my mind, as pictures linked to desires.

I commit myself to stopping any and all forms of sexual abuse within myself towards myself and towards another

I commit myself to stopping the apparent need for governments to stop abuse in my world, by observing myself within who I have become to see how I am living out the designs of abuse within myself.

I commit myself to stopping sexual fantasies and secret mind desires – and to learn to effectively direct myself here in my physical body

I commit myself to self-honest self-expression within sex and to stop any form of sexual abuse within my relationship/agreement.

I commit myself to develop effective communication within myself about what I am experiencing and to direct my experiences in the breath, through self-honesty and common sense, to stop the energy entity build ups, which lead to eventual abuse in my life and this world, as what others will also come to accept as ‘sex’.

I commit myself to stop any and all forms of sexual abuse through the media and the acceptance of sexuality as it currently exists today.

I commit myself in stopping patterns of sexuality in which I exist that are not what is best for all.