This blog is a
continuation from:
"Therefore when
I received this welcoming from J's guides - I decided to follow this positive
energy experience. J and I started spending more and more time together and the
more I spent time with him, obviously the more irritated my already prone to
irritation lol mother became and the more I wanted to avoid her. Obviously this
caused me to both stay away more from home and also to focus all of my minds
attention on my new found spirituality, to not have to admit that I actually
felt afraid, humiliated and 'done in'."
From there J started introducing me more and more to magic and spell casting. We started out with the more innocent types of spell casting (white magic), where for example one would cast spells for good fortune,
love, money, protection etc. But as
time went by lol, we progressed more and more into 'the dark side' Ok it was not that serious - get the picture of dead cats and sacrificed babies out of your head. Basically how it all started was as follows: both J and I were
living with our parents. He was diagnosed years before with depression due to a chemical imbalance and was medically excused from having to work in the system. He had spent a month or so in a psychiatric hospital when this chemical imbalance was detected, and was then released as an 'out patient', where the condition was that he would come back every 2 weeks to see a psychologist and stay on his medication. His parents initially were ok with this, but as
time went by they obviously started resenting the fact that he slouched around the house al day, doing minimal work and blatantly would brag at any opportunity he could get, especially to any Christian visitor how he was a wiccan and had guides etc etc.
So
being a Christian family - they firstly tried to accommodate his religion, but obviously there were certain points where the 2 belief systems would clash and J would meet them head on with a 'don’t you speak to me like that' attitude and then the parents would get angry and so forth. So what I picked up from the word go was that his parents had a tolerance level which J would at times step over deliberately, in an attempt as he would explain it to me, to show Christians that Wiccans also deserve the same respect and opportunities to express themselves, which Christians had been
give unconditionally, due to Christianity becoming the standardised religion in many parts of the world and especially South Africa since 'back in the day'. To top that off J was gay and not just gay, he would flaaaunt it. He had long blond hair and was quite feminine, sooo if you add that to the fact that he would push any christian's buttons with his 'I am a witch' talk - and obviously you would end up from time to time, with friction developing in their house.
So both J and myself
would confide in each other when we had arguments with family and from there
our magic started developing from 'white magic' which as I explained above as
the 'innocent'
type of spell casting, to 'grey magic' where we would cast spells
to 'bounce' what people did, back to them. LOL. Anyways so basically this meant
that if somebody was mean to us or would try and hurt us etc, we would cast a
spell so that whatever they did to us would go back to them 3 TIMES!! As I
said, looking back now I can giggle about these things, because seriously it
shows me, how religion shows firstly how effective the human imagination is in
created our own self interest, but to also be able to live out and express all
the nasty, thoughts and emotions that we have towards each other and ourselves,
while supressing our fears of each other, but under the guise of 'spirituality,
or 'religion'. Makes it all sound so plausible and innocent when you are
getting away with all kinds of shit in your mind towards yourself and others...
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